Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Source: top10kid.com | So North Korea doesn’t like to be told what it can and can’t do. Neither do 5-year-olds. But then, 5-year-olds don’t have access to nuclear weapons so it’s okay to let them have their hissy-fits. It’s totally not okay for a grown country to be shooting off missiles like they’re a bunch of Mexicans with pistolas having a “Fiesta” on Cinco de Mayo. To help keep the world a safer place, these are my suggestions for the TOP 10 Other Things North Korea Can Do To Piss Off The World.
10. Naming of the Offspring
Lots of countries have rules when it comes to naming your children. Making it a rule that all children be named after racial and stereotypical insults of other races languages therefore causing unintentional political incorrectness whenever a child’s name is spoken aloud.9. No Spoiler Alert
If North Korea really wanted to be dicks, they could just call live television conferences and then suddenly spoil everything from book endings to movie twists to season finales of popular TV shows that people haven’t yet watched on their DVRs.
8. Deportation
Bring The Kogi BBQ Truck back and only deliver in North Korea.7. Legalize Pot
And totally Bogart it.
6. Be More Immature
“South Korea? More like South BORE-ea!” “U.S.A? What’s that stand for? U Suck Ass? LOL!!!1!!”
5. Flaming Dog Poop
The members of the U.N. Security Council are clearly a bunch of old farts with no sense of humor, so why not pull the classic prank of the “Flaming Bag of Dog Poop” on all of their doorsteps.4. Confetti Missile
The reason everyone is so mad about these test launches is mostly because missiles are usually used to blow stuff up. If a missile did explode and nothing but confetti came out, people would have to at least pretend to be happy about it. Until they realize that stuff is a bitch to get out of carpet.3. National Anthem
Change it to the FreeCreditReport.com theme.2. A Name Change
Countries have changed their names in the past, but none of them have done it just to be a douchebag. North Korea could change their name to Awesometown or BetterThanYourCountry. Hell, they could just give it a symbol like Prince did if they really want to be an ass about it.
1. Psyche Out
Agree to all terms and treaties but then shout “Psyche!” every chance they get. (Wait…don’t they already do that?)
Actually, I think shooting off regular missiles is still the best way to go.
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